BRRRRRIIINNNGGGG!!

I opened my eyes and wondered for the nth time why I set my alarm to such an annoying noise. Of course, the whole reason it was my alarm was that only something as annoying as a school bell would be able to force me out of bed in the morning.

"Uuggh- GAH!" I rolled over my pillow and promptly fell off the bed with a loud thump. "Ow..." I cursed under my breath. Definitely awake now.

BRRRRRRIIIINNNGGG!!

"I'm up, I'm up," I growled, reaching up to my desk to grab my phone. I flipped it open and glared at the tiny screen, pressing the cancel button with more force than necessary. The ringing stopped, with the blessing of everyone in the vicinity. I snapped it close and got up from my resting spot on the floor, groaning as my back complained about the position I slept in last night.

"Michael? Are you up?" My door opened to reveal my mother in floral printed duster, her short hair bouncing in loose curls that almost looked natural. "I need some help moving some of the boxed by the door," she continued, giving an exasperated smile at my disheveled boxers-and-sando combo.

My mood immediately plummeted. Right. Today was that day. And here I thought that ignoring all the boxes stacked in the kitchen would stop it from ever happening. "Alright, I'm coming," I mumbled, hiding my glumness with a fake yawn. Her smile grew brighter.

That's my boy.

She gave me a quick kiss on the cheek before leaving the room. "And try not to take too long at getting ready! David's coming at nine!" she called, her footsteps growing softer as she went to her own room.

Hope my hair is okay, will David be impressed?

I groaned and slapped my hands over my face. Like I needed the reminder.

I took one last look around my room, taking in the plain, cream walls and wooden floor. Everything had been stripped bare of my things already, leaving an empty closet and a white plastic table (aka my "desk") to be folded up and transferred to my dorm. It's not like my room ever had much, but if there was one thing I was going to miss...

I craned my neck upwards, studying the painting on my ceiling. It was like a myriad of blue and violet shades, blending together into a nighttime masterpiece. There wasn’t a single star to be seen, only the different shades of darkness that could be smog, space, or sky. In a single corner shone the moon, all by itself, and yet seeming all the brighter for it. Its light seemed to push against the clouds surrounding it, making its own little space in the sky.

The sadness that came was sudden and deep, like a rock in my gut trying to sink through the ground. What would the next person who lived in the apartment do with it? Would they paint it over with their own chosen color, like whiting out a canvas? Or would they see the beauty in it and keep it there?

I didn’t know what was worse, so I looked at my feet and contemplated the floor instead. If only my father had painted it into something more portable. But if he had, would I have had as many peaceful nights as I did, lying on my bed and trying to make out the different colors in the sky?

“Michael?” My mother’s voice yanked me out of my thoughts. I looked up, startled, to find her staring at me, her forehead wrinkled with worry. “Oh, honey.” She walked up and grasped my face with both hands, smoothing her thumbs over my cheeks. I blinked, and realized that there was a wetness on my skin that I didn’t have before. “Look, you don’t have to move today. You could come live with me and David first, and transfer later-“

“No!” I blurted, jerking out of her hold. “No, I…” Guilt gnawed at my insides at the hurt expression on her face. “I’d rather not put this off,” I explained hurriedly. “The sooner it’s done, the sooner we can get it over with. Like ripping off a band aid, right?”

Her face relaxed a little, though there were still a few wrinkles at the corner of her eyes that meant she wasn’t soothed completely. “Alright.” Her hands returned to my face. Her voice trembled. “My big boy, moving away to college already.” Her eyes looked suspiciously shiny. “Just yesterday I was bringing you to your first day of preschool.”

This time I felt no guilt in rolling my eyes. “Mooom,” I groaned. She laughed, a little hiccup making its way into the end, before pulling away.

“Alright, alright, no more mushy feelings,” she teased, though her smile looked a little wobbly still. “Now get ready, before David gets here and sees you all ready to go in your underwear.”

“Right, of course,” I said weakly. Ahh, yes, David. Now that was one event that I was willing to put off as long as it takes.

“Hey, Michael!” David grinned at me as I entered the room, his teeth shining like two perfect rows of marble brick. “You ready for the big day?” Be friendly, David, smile! Just like in a meeting.

“Yeah!” I replied, trying to stretch my lips into something half as enthusiastic as his smile. I could see my mother shooting me her deadliest Mom Glare at me from the corner of my eye. “Absolutely!”

Behave! Oh, sure, like I was a five year old with a naughty streak. Don’t you worry your little head Mom, I am doing my absolute best.

“Good, good! It’s a great honor you know, getting a scholarship at the Greenwood University. You must have gotten your smarts from your mom.” His gaze veered a little to my right where my mom stood, which meant that he missed the moment my smile turned wooden and crooked.

“Right,” I said, my voice a lot less chipper. “Of course.”

Hihihi, oh stop looking at me like that, what a flatterer…

She looks so beautiful today, wait, what am I talking about, she always looks beautiful.

If you think seeing two adults make lovey-dovey eyes at each other is enough to make you want to rip your eyes out, imagine what it feels like being able to hear what they’re thinking while doing it. It’s ridiculous how often they manage to sound like a cheesy romance novel without even realizing it.

“So, are we ready to go?” I said, unable to keep a biting tone out of my voice. They jumped, David looking a bit sheepish while Mom glared at me reproachfully.

“Oh, yes, of course. But first-“ He raised his finger like some grade school teacher. The excited smile on his face immediately made me feel wary. “-a gift! For the new college boy!”

Oh, brilliant. “You really don’t have to,” I hedged, hoping against hope it wasn’t some kind of prototype from his office. David gave away prototypes like parents gave away candy on Halloween. They ranged from rabbit-shaped tape dispensers to wind-up flashlights that doubled as a hand fan. One time he even gave my mom a foldable rocking chair (complete with arm rests!) and declared he had named the product The Amanda. Mom’s thoughts were insufferable for days.

“It’s fine, it’s fine. It’s a gift from me and Sam, something to commemorate this important day.” I hope really hope he likes it. “Now where is Sam?” As if only noticing now, he looked around, as if the boxes in our living room would reveal her like a jack-in-the-box. “Sam? Sam!” Oh come on, Sammy, you promised, please don’t embarrass me…

Okay, I knew David was a bit scatterbrained, but what kind of man forgets where he left his daughter?

“Here, Dad.” The door to my right opened. A girl stepped out, the sound of a toilet flushing echoing from behind her. She wore a red plaid polo with slim jeans and a pair of black booties. Her short, cropped hair hung over her eyes, so that she was constantly flipping her head back to get her bangs out of her face.

Geez, I was just in the bathroom… no need to sound like the world is ending just because I’m not there.

This wasn’t the first time I’d met Sam. Mom and David were always trying to get the two of us to come along on their dates. From the few times I actually managed to see her, it seems I wasn’t the only one trying to use every excuse to get out of said dates.

Sam nodded at me in greeting, a poorly hidden scowl on her face. Can’t wait to get this over with, I don’t like it here, that guy always looks like such a know-it-all, always looking around with a bored expression…

I gave her my best smile just to be contrary. She twitched. What an idiot.

Well you’re an idiot too. Just because my mom is dating your dad doesn’t mean you should heap all your blame on me.

“Come on, Sam, say hi.” David told her. Please, please, you promised…

I am not a child! A grimace flashed across her face before her expression smoothed into something… shyer. “Hi,” she mumbled, giving my mom a little nod as well.

“Hey, Sam,” my mom replied, her smile gentle and sincere. “How’s school? Your third year just started, right?”

Sam returned her smile, the corner of her glossed up lips rising hesitantly. “Yeah. It’s pretty cool.” Act nice, Sam… she makes Dad so happy, so even if her son looks like an ass…

Oh, gee, I’m sorry for existing.

“Sam, show Michael what we got him for college,” David pressed again. Sam rolled her eyes, but reached into her sling bag and pulled out a package wrapped in deep, night sky blue. I felt my eyebrows rise against my will, reaching out for the gift almost before Sam even moved to hand it to me. Okay, just for the wrapping, I’ll give David the benefit of the doubt.

I can’t believe Dad is giving him an iPhone for college.

My hand froze over the wrapping.

What’s wrong with him? He looks like he’s seen a ghost!

What’s with that face? Oh no, doesn’t he like it? He hasn’t even opened it yet!

Michael? Michael, don’t be rude! Michael!

I gritted my teeth and tore into the packaging as quickly as I could – like ripping off a band aid – and uncovered the clear plastic box, showcasing a white iPhone in all its slim, touch screen glory.

Oh, Michael… My mom gasped softly, her hand rising to her lips.

“Do you like it?” David asked, hopefully, hesitantly. “I’ve seen you fiddling with your old phone and I thought you could use a new one. Should help you make some new friends, eh?” he tried to joke, giving me a grin like an invitation to join in on the fun.

I wasn’t sure how my face looked at that moment, but it was enough to make my mother put her arm around me and speak up instead. “Of course he likes it. We’re very thankful for your gift, aren’t we, Michael?” she said sweetly. Her arm squeezed mine. I’m sorry, he doesn’t know, I’ll tell him later, alright? Just be polite for now and thank him. Please, Michael?

I hadn’t stopped staring at the box. The iPhone sat on a tiny plastic throne, shining smugly in the living room light. My grip on the box tightened so hard it squeaked. Suddenly, I felt a rush of anger blaze through me, at my mom, at David, at Sam, at the world. I didn’t want to be here. I didn’t want my mom to be with David. I never even wanted to go to that stupid school in the first place!

“My dad gave me my phone.” The words fell through the air like a knife, cutting through the conversation and whatever fragile peace had been established. I could hear mom’s furious thoughts, David’s guilt stricken ones, and even Sam had a few surprised swear words to say. But I drowned them all out, unable to think of anything but the white rectangle worth a third of my tuition fee, so casually placed into my hands.

The car ride to my new school was silent and uneventful.

“Books? Blankets? Toiletries? Underwear?”

“Yes, mom.” I rolled my eyes. Somewhere down the hall, someone howled as he lost the board game they were playing.

How the hell could it have been Professor Plum?! I could have sworn that Jakey had that card in his hand!

My mother sighed, thankfully giving up on her fretting. The midafternoon sun streamed through the window and across her face, lining every wrinkle in the corners of her eyes and on the edges of her mouth. It struck me suddenly, how old my mom was. She was already past her prime, going on to forty. In the lobby of the dorm her back was straight, her shoulders even, and yet it felt as if fatigue weighed down on them, like it was all she could do to keep them up sometimes.

What would happen to her, I wondered, when I was gone?

“Look.” She tugged at my collar, unaware of what was going through my mind. “I’ll talk to David. I wish you’d go easy on him. He had no idea what your phone meant to you.” Now he’s going to feel guilty for hours (oh Michael, couldn’t you have controlled yourself?)

I stepped back, feeling stung, even though I knew she couldn’t help what she was thinking. Mom looked up at me, her face completely clueless. “What? What did I say?”

“Nothing.” I lied through my teeth. “It’s fine. I didn’t mean to snap at him either.” A half-truth. I didn’t know what I had meant to do at that moment.

Mom gazed at me, her brown eyes flickering over my face, but let it go. “Are you sure you want to stay here?” she asked instead. I bit back a sigh, tilting my head up towards the ceiling.

“Mom, that is the eighteenth time you asked me that-“

“I know, I know! It’s just… will you be okay with all these people around?” She pulled down my face until we were looking eye to eye. Her forehead was wrinkled with worry. “Won’t you get overwhelmed?” What if you just stay with me and David? You know he’s already prepared a room for you-

“Mom.” I took a deep breath and let it out of my nose. A bunch of guys passing by glanced at me and snickered, their thoughts shuttling between nerd and momma’s boy. Great. “I’ll be fine. I can handle it. I have to learn how to handle it. Besides, anything’s better than all the cheese you and David keep throwing at each other.”

She bit her lip, wavering between her Mom Mode and her David Mode (I know, disgusting, right?). “Does he really think-“ she began.

“Yes, he thought you were very pretty today, he is completely head over heels for you, blah blah blah blah. Is this Repeated Questions Day?” This time she rolled her eyes and gave me a smack on my arm for good measure.

“Don’t be impertinent,” she said sternly. “I’m just trying to take care of you.”

“I know Mom.” I was trying to be patient with her, I really was, but I was standing in the middle of the lobby being fussed over by my mother for all to see. At this rate I was going to be labeled as a wimp before I even set foot in class. I tried to soften my tone. “I’ll be fine, really. I’ll call you if I need anything.”

Her expression relaxed a little. “You will?” She searched my face. “You promise?”

“I promise.”

“Alright.” She smiled and gave my cheek one more caress. You know I’m proud of you no matter what, right?

I groaned. “Mooooom.”

She laughed, short but sweet. “Alright, alright, I’m leaving. Good luck dear!”

“Thanks. Have fun with David,” I added half-heartedly. Her smile brightened at that. She gave one last wave before turning around and leaving the room.

And just like that, I was alone. The hallway behind me seemed even louder with her gone. I slowly turned around, feeling like a rock was sitting on my chest. The maelstrom of thoughts and noise hung just out of reach, feeling ready to swallow me the moment I stepped afterward. I stood there, trepidation nailing my feet to the ground for who knew how long, until the man behind the counter coughed loudly into his hand. “It’ll be fine, boy. You’ll see her again,” he said gruffly when I turned around to look. I felt my cheeks burn.

“I’m fine,” I snapped, and stomped straight for the stairs.

It was like walking into a brick wall. I’ve never actually tried to measure how far my range was, but at that moment it felt like I could read the thoughts of the entire building.

FREEEEDOOOOM!!

Ohmanohmanohman where’s my laptop whereismylaptop???

I’m scared I don’t want to stay here Iwanttogohome

Is there WiFi here? What’s the password? Am I going to have to buy my own portable internet??

Putting my hands over my ears wouldn’t help me. Apparently hearing thoughts used a whole different organ for listening. I wanted to do it anyway, if only to feel like I was doing something about it. At least covering my ears would block out the actual physical noise from all these guys moving in, right?

This, I reflected, was why I never went to malls. The place would probably drive me nuts.

I forged through the first floor and walked up to the second. My door was right next to the stairs. The good thing about that was that I didn’t need to walk through three flights of stairs on the days I would inevitably have a ton of stuff to carry. The bad thing was, I would get to hear every single person who walked up the stairs and past my room.

I sighed as I unlocked the door and pushed it open. Was I supposed to feel this tired already?

Is that my roommate?

I blinked, finally realizing that I wasn’t alone. A boy stared at me from across the small room, pulling his hand out of a box when he realized I was here to stay. The first thing I noticed about him was his pale skin. Was he a foreigner or just a mestizo? His curly hair was a light brown, which could either be natural or the result of hair coloring. While he was definitely taller than me, he wasn’t so tall as to tower over everyone else my age, unlike this one black guy who was easily two heads taller than me I saw during registration.

Well? Is he going to speak up or not?

Oh, great. He’s going to be that kind of person, isn’t he.

“Hi,” I said warily, wondering if he was going to be aggressive. He looked just the type of guy who would look down his nose at people, regardless of height.

“Sup,” he replied, looking disinterested. I immediately pegged his accent as rich kid, private school. He sounded just like those teenage actors on TV who pretended to be poor when their nasal, lilting English gave it all away. I was tempted to harden my own clipped accent just to annoy him, but was too tired to pick a fight. At least my accent is real, not someone trying to sound classy.

Thin, dark skinned, hard accent… ah, must be a scholar. I twitched.

“Michael. Michael Reyes.” I said, sticking out a hand. He took it, giving it one firm shake.

“Carlos Singson.” Okay, so his dad was Filipino. “Looks like we’ll be spending a lot of time together.”

“Yeah, looks like.” I agreed, resisting the subconscious urge to match his accent.

Carlos raised an eyebrow. “Got any ground rules?”

I glanced at the half opened boxes on the bed furthest from the stairs and hid a wince. “No putting your stuff on my bed and my stuff on yours?” I offered, resigned to staying right next to the pathway of human traffic.

He nodded, his attention already drifting towards his own things. “Dibs on the bathroom in the mornings.”

“Dibs?” I repeated, before cursing silently. He paused, giving me a glance that made me feel like I had IDIOT POOR KID stamped across my forehead.

He doesn’t know what dibs means? Poor kid.

I fought to keep the scowl off my face. Just great. “I’ll go first,” he said. Other than that, he didn’t react at all.

“Right.” I jerked my head in a passing imitation of a nod and turned towards my own bed. I gritted my teeth and fought to keep my frustration hidden.

Greenwood University. Known as one of the top universities of the country, it was also known for being the private school for the rich kids of the country. In a country like the Philippines, this meant sprawling green fields (hence the name), buildings with clean, creamy paint, entire buildings equipped with aircon, and campus-wide WiFi access. The place was huge, the grounds about the size of your average mall complex. Its graduates were known for becoming the best lawyers, doctors, politicians and businessmen in the country. The saying went, if you went to Greenwood University, your future is pretty much set in success.

In a country where the government was fraught with corruption, the businessmen only focused on getting richer, and most of the citizens couldn’t even afford their education, it was regarded with the same cross of respect and scorn you’d give a bad teacher: you needed him to get your diploma, but that didn’t mean you could hate him while you worked for it.

“You okay, bro?” Carlos spoke up. Please don’t cry, that would totally be uncool…

“I’m fine. I’m going out for a walk.” I didn’t even wait for him to reply, grabbing my phone and ducking out the door.

Haven’t even been here for a day and already I wanted to go home.

Then I remembered that home now meant David’s house and felt infinitely worse.