Four Years Ago

Deacon’s POV

I looked up from the beer I was nursing and my eyes met the sight of an angel. She was beautiful. Blonde wavy hair falls around her beautiful face and she has eyes that I swear were a light shade of purple. Her smile was one that I was sure if I hadn’t of been sitting down would have knocked me off my feet. Pink soft lips curved upwards showing of cute dimples and pearly white teeth. Beautiful.

Her dress was just another thing that made her stand out. Unlike all the other women in the bar tonight who were wearing dresses that showed mass amounts of cleavage and ass, this girl was wearing a blue sun dress that ended just above the knee, with a cream cardigan that was buttoned up. Completely gorgeous!

She was talking to the bar tender and he was smiling back at her. He handed her what looked like a coke. I watched her as she sipped the coke and showed that beautiful smile again. I had to talk to her! I had to see if she had a voice that made me go insane because just looking at her had me halfway there. Rising from my stool I made my way over to her. As I got closer my heart sped up it was as if my body knew her. I came up beside her and when I took a deep breath I could smell her perfume. It was flowery and intoxicating. I wanted to bury my face in her neck and smell it on her skin but I knew if I did that I’d probably get punched in the face. I coughed and she swung her gaze around to me. Her eyes locked on mine, yep, purple just like I thought.

“Oh sorry I’ll move” she rose from the stool and went to move past me.

“Ah no sorry I wanted to know if I could buy you a drink” I ask her. Her beautiful eyes widen and she blinked.

“Wait what?” she asks. I blink shaking my head trying to remember what I had just said.

“Would you ah like a drink?” I ask again, my palms are sweaty. Shit it was like high school all over again. No scrap that even in high school I had never been nervous when talking to girls. This girl, this beautiful girl had me completely wound up.

“Why would you wanna buy me a drink?” she asks confused. It is official this girl is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. Her voice is gorgeous, her southern accent make my knees buckle.

“Why wouldn’t I want to buy the most beautiful girl in the bar a drink?” I ask with a smile. And just when I think she can’t possibly get anymore beautiful she blushes and my head begins to spin.

“You obviously haven’t looked at some of the women in this bar then” she says her voice low and her eyes glance around the bar nervously.

“Trust me I have and all their beauty is fake. You stand in this bar and you are completely yourself and trust me, Angel, you have know idea how beautiful you are to me.” I smile and I know I can’t resist anymore I have to touch her. I brush my fingers over her cheek and my fingers tingle with the contact. She leans into it only to pull back seconds later her eyes wide.

“How did you know my name?” she demands.

“What?” I ask, confused.

“My name! How do you know it, are you some kind of stalker?” she asks backing away from me.

“What I don’t know your name” I tell her and hold up my arms in surrender.

“You called me, Angel!” she says her voice shaky.

“Yeah because you look like an angel, your so beautiful…. Wait your name is Angel?” I ask shocked.

“Yes, so you mean you don’t know me, you just called me angel like you would call a girl Honey or Babe?” she asks.

“Yeah I never would have thought your name was Angel!” I say. “Can we start over?”

She looks at me for a moment and I have a sudden wave of panic come over me. What if she says no and tells me to bugger off.

“Okay. Hi my name is Angel and you are?” she holds out her hand to me and I smile.

“My name is Deacon, now can I buy you a drink?” I wait patiently for her answer. She bites her lip and I nearly groan; now visions of me biting her lip are in my head and that leads to more inappropriate thoughts. I mean if she knew where my thoughts were currently heading she would say no and be out of this bar in an instant.

“Sure” she replies and I sigh in relief.

Angel’s POV

What the hell are you doing, Angel? Is what I am currently thinking to myself! Here I am in a bar on a Friday night and I’m sitting with a guy who is way out of my league. He is insanely good looking, his hair is dark and sexy and same with his eyes. They are this deep chocolate colour and then there is that beautiful smirk that seems to remain on his lips. Technically I think it is just a smile but it makes him look like the guys my Daddy warned me about. I feel breathless in his presence. Which is completely unusual for me. Usually I am calm and collected, yet this guy makes my head spin and all my nerves rise to the surface.

“So Angel what brings you here tonight?” he asks. His voice is another thing that make his sexiness even more intense, it so deep, the kind of voice that make you want to agree to every single thing he says.

“Uh, my cousin is in the band” I tell him. He cast a glance towards the stage where my cousin, Lila is playing. “She is the one on guitar”

Suddenly I wish I had never told him that, Lila is the kind of girl that turns head. She was a model all through high school until she rebelled against her parents and decided she would rather play a guitar in a grungy rock band with her new boyfriend Gecko.

“So Deacon, what brings you here?” I ask quietly. I watch as he looks back at me and picks up his beer and takes a long sip.

“I’m on leave from the military and I go back overseas in a week. My mate was supposed to meet me here but bailed on me. Then I saw you and now we are here” he smiles his eyes are intense and I glance at my hands quickly and start playing with my fingers. His hand suddenly covers mine and I jump startled by the contact.

“Sorry” I apologise. I look up and see his eyes meet mine. I suck in a breath and pray that I don’t pass out. No guy has ever looked at me the way Deacon is looking at me now. That thought makes me nervous; I look away on to have Deacon lightly move my chin back so I am looking at him again.

“You are so beautiful, Angel. When I touch you my whole body tingles, that has never happened before, you make me feel so alive it’s crazy, I’ve only just met you but I feel like I’ve known you forever.” His voice is so low and his words send shivers across my body.

“I know what you mean” I reply breathlessly.

“Can I kiss you?” he asks and I freeze. I have been kissed twice before in my entire life. Sad for a twenty year old, I know. What makes it even worse is one when I was twelve and the bully at my high school decided it would be funny to kiss me and run off and the second time being when I was sixteen and I kissed Billy Ruck behind the barn on my Daddy’s farm, which ended when my Daddy found us and pointed a shotgun at Billy and told him that if he ever saw his face again it would be with a bullet hole between the eyes. I had cried for two days after, I have seen Billy once since and he literally ran in the opposite direction and nearly got hit by a car in the process.

“Um..” is all I manage to get out before his lips meet mine. His hand cups my cheek as he gently kisses my lips. I kiss him back and discover that he is a far better kisser than Billy Ruck. The kiss deepens and I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him back harder, this seems to encourage him since he groans against my mouth. Our tongues meet and he kisses me more aggressively.

I hear a whistle and a catcall and pull back hastily from the kiss. Smoothing my dress over I lean back in my chair, breathing deeply. I look back at Deacon and his eyes are wide and the look on his face can be described in two words: pure lust.

DEACON’S POV

Holy shit!

That is all I can say. Kissing her is like nothing I have ever experienced before. My whole body felt like it was on fire. I wanted this girl like crazy. She had done something to me; I don’t know if it was her shy nature, her beautiful eyes or her charming southern accent but this girl had me thinking crazy things. Like maybe there was such thing as the one. My brother Mitch had always sad that from the day he say his girlfriend Becca, he knew that she had been made for him. I had always teased him and told him that that was bullshit and that it was impossible to think that everyone had someone out their for them but meeting Angel had me thinking that maybe it could be true. My whole body responded to this girl it was completely different from anything I had ever felt before.

“Wow” she says quietly. Her lips are now puffy and red, she looks so sexy I have to control the urge to grab her and take her back to where I am staying.

“Yeah” I whisper back.

“I’ve never been kissed like that before” she tells me. I nearly groan, shit it should be illegal to say shit like that.

“Then you haven’t been with the right men, babe.” I say. She bites her lip and this time I can’t help it. I groan.

“What?” she asks “Are you okay I have some aspirin in my bag if you need some.”

“Don’t bite your lip, Angel,” I groan. “Your seriously too sexy for your own good”

Angel blushes and I grin as she casts her eyes down towards the table. She is totally adorable and she doesn’t even see it.

“Do you want to go out with me? It’s only nine and we could go see a movie or grab a pizza or something?” I ask her. Suddenly I’m nervous again. Seriously I have no clue what this girl is doing to me. I am twenty years old and have never been this nervous not even when I was a freshman about to loose my virginity to Tracey Hill, a senior and the captain of our high school cheerleading squad.

“Um, yeah okay” she says with and small smile. “I’ll just let Lila know I’m leaving, I’ll be right back okay”

I watch her walk away and am overwhelmed with the sudden urge to follow her to make sure she hasn’t run away. I remain in my seat and tap my foot impatiently against the floor. Five minutes pass and they are the longest five minutes of my life. When I see her blue sundress emerge from the crowd I stand up and meet her halfway.

“You ready?” I ask.

“Completely” she replies and that smile appears on her lips once again and I find it nearly impossible to breathe.

Angel’s POV

My father had always told me that when you meet the person you are meant to be with, you would know the second that they kiss you. When their lips touch yours and the whole world around you ceases to exist, that is the moment when you know you have met your soul mate.

This is what I feel when I kiss Deacon. I feel like nothing in the world matters but his lips on mine, my hands in his hair and his arms around my waist puling me tight against his body. I don’t know how we ended up at the place where Deacon was staying, one minute we were sharing a pizza at his favourite pizza place, next minute we are on his couch, his hands up my dress and my arms around his neck.

We had talked all night, he told me he was a twin and I told him that I was an only child. He talked about his loving parents and I told him about my Dad and decided to leave out my mother. He told me more about his career in the military. He was in the Navy working his way up and hoping to get a spot with the navy seals. He asked me what I did and I told him about how I had graduated early and therefore had just finished studying I.T and was applying to be an FBI agent. He had been shocked which I had found amusing. He had asked me why I was interested in the FBI and I had given him a vague response and had kept the real reason to myself.

Not many people knew of my father’s murder and that is how I wanted it to stay. When I moved here to Seattle, I had left my old life behind. I hated my mother for moving on so quick after my father’s death and to someone like Craig Lawson off all people, a billionaire with who was a perverted old man with more money than sense. My father had been my best friend and when he was shot in a bank robbery I knew I wanted to be in law enforcement and after seeing episodes of Criminal Minds I kind of wanted to be like Penelope and help solve the cases from behind the scenes.

Deacon was like a breath of fresh air in my dull life and right now with his hands cupping my breasts and his mouth on mine I knew he was exactly what I wanted in life.

“You okay, Baby?” he groans against my throat. I moan in response and he grins against my neck. I reach down and grab my dress pulling it roughly over my head. Deacon’s eyes fill with lust as he looks down at me dressed in matching purple bra and panties.

“You like?” I ask and kiss his check and begin trailing kisses down his jaw.

“You have no fucking idea, Angel” he grips my waist and pulls me onto his lap. I pull his shirt over his head and nearly faint at the sight of his chest. He looked like the model on a freaking Calvin Klein ad. I whimper and this seems to turn him on more because he grabs my ass and grinds me against his lap.

I am so turned on I can hardly breathe. This man would be the end of me. I have never been this naked with a guy before and suddenly I feel shy. Compared to him I look extremely unfit. I am now seriously regretting the two donuts I ate for lunch.

He pushes me back on the couch and begins kissing his way up my body. Starting with my thigh and moving up past my panties, onto my stomach and keeps going till he reaches my lips. I think that was the single hottest thing I had ever experienced in my life. How the hell had I gone through both college and high school with no sex? Anyone who passed this up was a crazy idiot. I run my hands along his chest and it is official. I am retracting my previous statement; the hottest thing I had ever experienced in my life was running my hands along Deacon’s chest while he kissed my throat.

“What I would give to be inside your head right now, Angel” he whispers against my lips. I kiss him back fiercely his tongue mixes with mine and I can officially announce that I am addicted to his taste. I reach for his belt and he grabs my hand to stop me.

“What?” I ask as he looks into my eyes.

“If you do that then I’m not going to be able to stop. If you are not one hundred per cent sure about this then we need to stop now while I still have a shred of control left.” he looks so serious and I smile, tears forming in my eyes.

“I want you,” I whisper and with that he crushes his lips into mine. My hand reach behind my back and I unhook my bra. It falls to the floor and I hear Deacon groan. I run my fingers over his shoulder blades and ask an important question. “Where’s the bedroom?”

He grabs me by the waist and I wrap my legs around him and kiss him deeply. We begin to move the direction of what I assume is the bedroom. We get there, only bumping into a few walls along the way. I am thrown back on to large bed, I bite my lip and watch as Deacon undoes his belt and drops his jeans. Standing there in a pair of Calvin Klein briefs he looks like he should be on a billboard in Time Square. He grins down at me and I can’t help but get lost in those gorgeous chocolate eyes. He moves towards the bed and I quickly get rid of my panties, his eyes arm swimming with lust and he crawls along the bed and hovers over me.

I find myself blushing when he removes his briefs and we are both naked on the bed.

“First time is going to be quick, I’m sorry but I need you so bad, baby” he groans and reaches between my legs. I groan as he touches me and then suddenly he fills me. I gasp in pain and feel him freeze.

“I’m good.” I say through the pain.

“Shit, Angel. Why didn’t you tell me?” he said and leaned his forehead against mine.

“Because I knew you wouldn’t do it if you knew” I reply.

“Fuck” he groans. I wiggle my hips and he looks down at me before he starts to move. “I’m sorry for hurting you, I’ll make it up to you all night, okay!”

He kisses me and suddenly the pain turns into something so much better. Yeah I was wrong again. This is definitely the hottest thing I have ever experienced in my life.

Deacon’s POV

Four Days Later

For some unknown reason this girl had me. When I look at her, my whole world seems to stop. Since the night we met we have become inseparable. I was supposed to visit home before I leave but I can’t seem to leave this girl. The sex is amazing, but that is not it. I can sit and talk to this girl for hours, we love the same movies and food and I can’t seem to take my eyes off her. I swear I could sit there for hours listening to her voice. Never had I not been excited to go back on tour, usually I can’t stand the idea of being on leave. But this girl, man, she has me thinking things I never have thought before. Things that if my best friend Jace knew, he would tell me I was crazy and to never sleep with the same girl twice. Yet Angel had me thinking of years down the track and things like weddings and children. All stuff that I had sworn to myself was not for me. I had 14 left with her and I never wanted it to end. The idea of heading back overseas, with no promise of return had me nervous for the first time ever. Usually I was a cocky bastard and shrugged it off when my mother begged me not to go back but now with the knowledge that I might never see Angel again after I leave tomorrow had me trembling in my boots.

In the last few days we have spent all our time together, we have been separated once, when she went to grab some clothes. We’ve watched movies, went on walks, she showed me the sights and we had the most mind blowing sex I have ever experienced. She told me about what it was like to grow up on a farm and she told me about her father and how much she loved him and how sad she was when he passed. In return I told her about me, my brother Mitch, twin sister Love and parents too. I told her the story of the moment I knew I wanted to be in the military a story that apart from Jace, who was with me at the time, I had never told anyone else.

“I have to leave tomorrow morning” I say as we sit in my mate Stevie’s apartment which I were I have been staying while on leave. She looks up from her Chinese food and gives me a small smile.

“What time do you have to leave?” she asks, those beautiful lavender eyes looking at me. My heart aches in my chest, she so fucking beautiful.

“By nine I have to be packed and on my way to the airport.” I tell her. She nods and looks down at her food. This is the quietest we have ever been, usually we are chatting and laughing while we eat. Now with the end in sight we don’t know what to say. “You want to watch a movie?”

“Okay” she whispers. I jump up from my chair and clear the table. I watch her as she walks over to the shelf where the movies are. I watch her brow scrunch up as she concentrates. Tonight she is wearing another bloody sundress, shorter than the last, it is pink and I can see the straps of her lacy indigo bra, as she isn’t wearing a cardigan. Her blonde hair is loose and curling down her back. She is utterly breathtaking.

“Something funny, babe” I say turning towards the kitchen sink. I put the left overs on a plate and cover it with wrap, then quickly rinse the plates. When I turn back I see her putting a dvd in the player. I walk over and sit on the couch and wait for her. She grabs the remote before shuffling over to the couch and sitting down close to me. I wrap my arm around her and pull her to my chest.

Is it possible for a girls scent to be addicting? She smells amazing all the time, I have no idea how, she has been using male body wash for the last four days and I know that the scent isn’t that. It must be just her scent it should be illegal it makes me want her all the time.

“What are we watching tonight” I ask in a whisper as the previews start.

“Blades of Glory” she replies and kisses underneath my chin. I nearly groan at the contact of her lips on my throat.

“Don’t babe, or we won’t even make it past the previews” I say as she kisses her way along my jaw. She giggles and it is the hottest noise in the world. I pull her on to me so that she straddles my waist and she proceeds to pull my top over my head. Her hands and lips are running wild over my upper body as she grinds against me and I have to put a stop to this or I’m going to embarrass myself and come in my jeans like a fifteen year old. I quickly flip us so that her back is on the couch and I am hovering above her. I look down into her eyes and she stares back at me. I don’t know how long passes but it feels like years. My heart flips in my chest as her lips curve into a small smile.

“Kiss me!” she breathes. I move in and my lips graze across hers, I will never forget how her lips feel against mine or how her body feels pressed against mine or how her little moans push me over the edge. I bunch up her dress around her waist and she that her panties are a light blue. For some unknown reason the fact that her bra and panties aren’t matching sends me into some kind of frenzy. My lips meet hers in a fast, furious kiss. Her hands pull at my hair and she moans against my lips.

“Oh my god” she moans. I pull her from the couch and pull her towards the bedroom I have been using. We fall to the bed in a passionate embrace and I grin and look up at her as she decides that she wants to take control. She pulls her dress over her head, removes her bra.

No wonder her name is Angel, the sight of her in nothing but a pair of lacy blue panties could make a guy feel like he’s in heaven.

13 hours later

I look at the airport in front of me Angel stands besides me, her blonde hair blowing in the breeze. Her smile is fake even after only four days I can tell that. I turn towards her and full her to me. Her lips trembles and I lightly press my lips against them.

“You look sexy in uniform.” she says and I laugh.

“You have already said that twice this morning” I tell her. She shakes her head and grips me by the shirt.

“It’s true though, you do” she kiss my lips lightly and steps back. She places something In my hand and I look down and see a stack of four polaroid photos. I look down and see her on the night we met wearing that blue sundress and cardigan. I smile and flick to the next one and see one of us together in front of the space needle. The next one is the same taken moments later and we are kissing. The last photo is the one that does me in. It is one of Angel, in nothing but a pair of blue panties her arm covering her breasts.

“Fuck, Angel” I say and pull them closer hoping that no one else saw that last one. I pull out the one of us cuddling in front of the space needle. I hand it back to her. She looks up confused I smile back at her.

“To remember me by” I tell her. Her eyes fill with tears and I look up at the sky praying to god that I don’t cry in front of her.

“You’re coming back though,” she whispers. “Right?”

I bite my lip and run my hand through my hair. This girl is amazing, so amazing there is no way I am good enough for her. I know that it will drive me crazy but I do the one thing that I know I have to.

“I don’t know I can’t promise that and so I have to say this” I say she shakes her head and pulls back from me. I grip her arm and move her chin back so she is looking at me.

“Deacon don’t!” she begs, tears leak from her eyes and the sight of them running down her cheeks nearly brings me to my knees.

“Move on, find someone who can give you the world. You deserve so much better than me, Angel and you will see that after I am gone. In a few months I’ll be nothing to you but a guy you met in a bar” I tell her. She sobs and I bite my lip and take a step back. It takes everything I me to pick up my bag and not pull her to me and kiss her senseless.

I lean in and kiss her forehead. She grabs my arm and tries to keep me by her side. I shake her off and take one more look at her beautiful face before quickly turning on my heel and walking into the airport and away from a girl who deserves the world. A world that I can’t give her.

Angel’s POV

1 month, 3 weeks & 2 days later

It had been a month, three weeks and two days since the day at the airport. Since then my life had managed to crumble around me. I lost my apartment when I refused to give my landlord a blowjob when I was a day late with rent. My mother decided that the allowance she give me is cut off as I am an adult now and should be able to make it in the real world by myself. I have no doubt that this was Craig was behind this as he hated me and ever since I turned down his nephew Augustus last Christmas and I also believe he is the reason that I got turned down at the FBI. I have no doubt that my mother still believes I will come back home and marry someone who has a stick up their ass and to add to the list of bad things happening in my life lately, the last few days I have been feeling like utter crap. I must be coming down with the flu and even though my world had crumbled I hardly cared because all I could think about was Deacon.

I knew him, not even a week and yet without him I can hardly function. My life has consisted of ice cream, movies and sleep. Being in this city hurt, everywhere I looked I saw him. I knew I loved him and that made it so much worse. I had only loved one other person in my life and that was my father. To me Deacon was a chance at a new life, with a new family. The way he had talked about his family made me think that one day I might have something like that too.

The only thing in my life that was keeping me sane was my best friend Willow Farris. She had let me crash on her couch while I try and find a new apartment.

Willow and I have been friends ever since I moved to town. She is a gorgeous red head with a fiery temper and she manages to make me smile no matter how down I am. She was an assistant at a major company in Seattle and worked for the hottest guy in town, Lincoln Reynolds. She worked through the day and was on call mostly all the time so she rarely saw my emotional breakdowns. She was currently on a business trip and wasn’t due back until tomorrow. So safe to say the last few days have consisted of me lounging in Willows bed with multiple tubs of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream while wearing stained pyjamas, crying while watching movies I had watched with Deacon. Well I was until Willow returned home early and walked in did a double take when she saw me.

“What the hell?” she asks. Willow doesn’t know about Deacon, whenever I try to talk about him no words come out. I’m beginning to think that maybe I am going crazy.

“You’re back early, did you have fun with sexy boss man?” I ask while sniffling into an overly used tissue.

“He is as gorgeous as ever and no it was plain business as per usual with that guy,” she says. “Anyway, sweetie, have you showered since I left?”

She moves to the window and opens the window, blinding me with the light of day.

“Hey!” I shout and shield my eyes from the blaring sun. She cranks open the window and turns back to me with a glare on her face. Which turns into a look of shock when she sees the ten empty containers of ice cream on the floor besides her bed.

“Oh my god, Angel. What the hell is going on? Have you eaten anything apart from ice cream since I left? What the hell has gotten into you I know you are poor and living on my couch, well now my bed, but seriously what the hell has gotten into you?” she asks and comes and sits on the bed besides me. She sits down and I can tell my the way her nose cringes that maybe not showering or moving further than the refrigerator in the last four days has been a mistake.

“I should probably have a shower.” I say.

“You think? God will I ever get the smell out of my mattress?” she mutters and pulls the half eaten tub of ice cream from my hands. “I hope you haven’t left the house like this. You look scary, Angel”

“No the grocery store down the street delivers, all though I think the delivery boy has been turned off women forever” I snort in a laugh and Willow looks at me like I am crazy.

“Get in the shower, while I strip the sheets and wash your hair, it looks like something is living in there!” she pulls me up from the bed and pushes me in the direction of the bathroom.

After my shower, Willow makes me go outside and onto the deck to wait for her. The fresh air hits me and I have to say it feels amazing. I sit down on the swing and look out onto the small garden while I wait for her. A moment later she walks out the door and comes to sit besides me. She shoves a bag into my hand and I look inside a see a chicken burger from the pub down the road. I groan as the amazing smells hit me.

“Thanks” I say quietly.

“So, who is he?” she asks not looking at me. I glance at her in shock and she looks over at me and gives me a look that says ‘seriously’.

“Oh come on, no girl doesn’t shower and eat nothing but ice cream for a whole week without it being about a boy” she says. “So again, who is he?”

“Deacon, I met him nearly two months ago” I reply. Her eyes widen but she nods at me to continue. “I spent four days with him, and it wasn’t just sex, even thought that was amazing, we laughed and got on so well and we liked all the same stuff”

“So what happened?” she asks.

“He left, he’s a solider, he got shipped off again and he made absolutely no promise that he’d ever be back. He told me to move on and forget about him. But I can’t he is all I think about all the time. I miss him so much, Willow.” I cry and she pulls me into a hug.

“You’re in love with him!” she said it as a statement and not a question. I nod and then sob into her neck. “Oh sweetie, it will be fine.”

“I’m pissed at him for leaving and not saying he will come back to me” I cry.

“I know men can be jerks. Take my boss Lincoln, he is a totally idiot the guy hooks up with that many girls and is then pissed when magazines label him as a player. I mean if you act like one then you’re going to be named as one” she huffs. I pull back and wipe the tears from my eyes.

“You know you should just screw him and get it over with!” I say with a small smile. She gives me a horrified look and I laugh. The girl is in love with this guy and she hasn’t got a single clue.

“Eww and risk a disease? No way!” she shudders.

“Okay whatever you say, Willow” I say and grab the burger from the bag and take a deep breathe.

“Anyway, the reason I came back early is because we are moving!” she says with a smile.

“What?” I ask confused.

“I found you a job, and my company is moving to Portland and I thought you might want to come?” she looks up at me and I can see pleading in her eyes.

“What kind of job?” I ask.

“A friend of Lincoln’s has just opened a security company. They need some with amazing I.T skills and I kind of suggested you. They looked up your results from college and talked to some of your professors and they offered you the job straight up” she smiled and I smiled.

“Maybe this is what I need.” I say quietly.

“I think so! I think this is the opportunity to get over this guy and get your life started. Your mother can’t hold you back this time, the job is your and we can have a new start in Portland. So what do you say?” she leaned forward waiting for my answer.

A million reasons for saying no rushed through my head. But then I thought of Deacon and how he wants me to move on. Maybe I need to literally move on, there is nothing left for me here in Seattle.

“Okay”

TWO WEEKS LATER

I was in love with our apartment in Brooklyn. It was a three bedroom, two baths. I had my own bathroom and the kitchen looked like it was straight out of a magazine. Thanks to Willow’s sexy boss we got an apartment in the building he owned with the lowest rent rate that I have ever seen. Personally I think the guy is in love with her. I mean who gives an amazing apartment to his assistant for less than half the rent that it is worth.

We had been here for two weeks now and I was enjoying my job at Sabar Security. My boss Daniel was ex-military and an extremely nice guy. My job included everything from fixing computers, to researching and planning projects. It was safe to say I loved my new job. My job was taking my mind off Deacon, although I still thought about him all the time it didn’t hurt as much anymore.

“Hey Angel, do you want to come with me to the doctors” Willow asks from the lounge room. I am in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal.

“Why what’s wrong with you?” I ask.

“Nothing I just figured we should fine a doctor in Portland and get a check up or something, I got us appointments with a doctor who is supposed to be great here” she smiles. God it had been years since she had been to the doctors, last time was when she was eighteen when she had the flu. Come to think of it might be a good idea to have a check up and find a doctor here in Portland.

“Okay cool, what time?” I ask.

“In a couple of hours I wanted to know if you wanted to get lunch first?” she jumps up off the couch and wanders into the kitchen. I love the open plan living in this apartment.

I finish eating and head to my room. I find a pair of jeans and a t-shirt and find myself regretting the week of ice cream. I can hardly button my jeans, after a few minutes of struggling I decided to forget about the jeans and pull on a pair of sweats instead. I pull my hair up into a ponytail and grab my purse of the bedside table.

We head out and go to our favourite restaurant, Diego’s. The waiter Manny directs us to a table and we sit down. Willow orders a salad and I order the chicken pasta salad. We talk about work and she tells me what is happing with sexy boss man. I tell her about my work and how moving was probably the best thing I have ever done. When the food arrives, my stomach rumbles and not in a good way. I smell the chicken and cover my mouth scared I will throw up all over the table.

“You okay?” Willow asks in a worried voice. I shake my head no and make a quick dash to the bathroom where I proceed to throw up my breakfast. A few moments later Willow enters the room and looks at me on the floor.

“I’m okay.” I tell her, yet my tone is not really convincing. She shakes her head and helps me up off of the floor.

“We are skipping lunch and going straight to the doctors!” she tells me. I try and stop her but she is relentless. We pay for our uneaten meals and leave, on the ride over to the doctor’s office I begin to feel a little bit better. Willow pulls me from the car and originally her appointment was before mine but now she demands that I see the doctor first. The doctor walks out, she is a woman probably in her late forties, and she has dark black hair with streaks of grey and hazel eyes. She is wearing a lab coat over a pink flowery dress.

“Miss Farris and Miss Carmichael?” she asks. Willow practically pulls me from my seat and into her office. “I am Dr. Reeves, so you girls are just here for standard check up. I see Miss Farris has her medical files sent over, Miss Carmichael as soon as you can please have your records sent over.”

“Sure” I mutter.

“She threw up on the way here. We were having lunch and she just ran to the bathroom. I’m really worried about her I think she is depressed, she found the love of her life and he left and now she sits around eating ice cream all day!” Willow sucks in a breath when she finishes. I glare at her, did she really have to tell the doctor my bloody life story. Dr. Reeves looks a little shocked and immediately starts checking me over.

“Have you been throwing up a lot or feeling nauseous?” she asks.

“A couple of weeks back I was feeling a bit off. Headaches, I felt nauseous too.” I say, she nods and asks for a blood sample.

“It might just be a virus of some kind but I want to run some quick tests just to make sure, anything else I need to know?” she asks and she draws blood.

“Oh I’ve put on weight as well, my jeans don’t button up but that could be because I’ve been eating a lot of sweets lately.” I tell her with a bit of guilt in my voice. She nods and checks my weight and finishes my check up. She sends my blood down the hall to be tested and moves on to Willow’s exam while we wait. Just as she is finishing up with Willow a nurse comes in holding a piece of paper, she smiles at us and hands the paper to Dr Reeves and then leaves. I watch as she opens it and I feel Willow grip my hand.

“Well, it’s not a virus, Miss Carmichael” she says. I freeze maybe it is cancer? It runs in the family, oh my god, how bad could it be maybe I have a month to live or a few years. I am so caught up in my thoughts that I don’t hear the doctor’s next words. I feel Willow drop my hand and I look up at her and she is staring at me in shock.

“Wait what? I didn’t hear you, sorry” I say and bite my lips waiting for her to speak.

“You’re pregnant, congratulations” she smiles and I try to think of something to say and find nothing. “We will do an ultrasound to see how far you are along and to see if the baby is healthy, okay?” I nod and she directs me over to the chair.

Willow sits next to me holding my hand. Dr Reeves puts gel on my stomach and uses the ultrasound wand. I hear a noise and look at the screen on my left.

“That noise is your baby’s heart beat, and that right there is your baby. I’d say your just over two months pregnant” I nod and feel tears in my eyes I quickly wipe them and feel Willow squeeze my hand tight I look over at her and smile weakly.

“It’s going to be fine, Angel” she tells me and kisses my check. I smile and nod but deep down I know that everything wasn’t going to be fine. Not unless I find Deacon, and that was going to be hard, especially when I didn’t even know his last name.